Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs

Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs Maybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge When children s librarian and self professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed twenty five dollars

  • Title: Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs
  • Author: Molly Harper
  • ISBN: -
  • Page: 176
  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • Maybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge When children s librarian and self professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed twenty five dollars in potato skins instead of a severance check, she goes on a bender that s sure to become Half Moon Hollow legend On her way home, she s mistaken for a deer, shot, and leftMaybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge When children s librarian and self professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed twenty five dollars in potato skins instead of a severance check, she goes on a bender that s sure to become Half Moon Hollow legend On her way home, she s mistaken for a deer, shot, and left for dead And thanks to the mysterious stranger she met while chugging neon colored cocktails, she wakes up with a decidedly unladylike thirst for blood Jane is now the latest recipient of a gift basket from the Newly Undead Welcoming Committee, and her life after lifestyle is taking some getting used to Her recently deceased favorite aunt is now her ghostly roommate She has to fake breathing and endure daytime hours to avoid coming out of the coffin to her family She s forced to forgo her favorite down home Southern cooking for bags of O negative Her relationship with her sexy, mercurial vampire sire keeps running hot and cold And if all that wasn t enough, it looks like someone in Half Moon Hollow is trying to frame her for a series of vampire murders What s a nice undead girl to do

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      Molly Harper

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    1. My mother remembers an 8 year old me setting up my writing office in our living room by putting her old manual typewriter on the couch next to a toy phone And I very slowly pecked out the story of my third grade class taking a trip around the world and losing a kid in each city.I had a dark sense of humor, even then.In high school, when other girls my age were writing poems about dying unicorns and bleeding roses, I was writing essays about having political arguments with my dad at the dinner table Whoever made the other person laugh at their own political party won the argument I knew I wanted to write when I grew up, but I also knew there was very little chance I could make a living writing books, so I went for the next best thing newspaper writing I majored in print journalism at Western Kentucky University and used my shiny new degree to get a job at my hometown newspaper I married my high school sweetheart, David, a local police officer And for six years, I wrote about school board meetings, quilt shows, a man losing the fully grown bear he kept as a pet in his basement, and a guy who faked his death by shark attack in Florida and ended up tossing pies at a local pizzeria I loved my job at the paper I loved meeting new people every day and never knowing where I would end up But somehow, the ever shifting schedules of a police officer and a reporter did not equal family friendly One of us needed to take a normal job for the sake of our young daughter I took a secretarial position at a local church office, which left me with dependably free evenings for the first time in my adult life David was working the night shift that summer and I was losing.mind We were living in The Apartment of Lost Souls while building our new home This was the place where appliances and small electronics went to die Every night I would tuck our snoozing child into bed and wait for the washing machine to start smoking or the computer to suddenly flash the blue screen of death Then there was the plague of frogs in the bathroom that put our daughter of potty training for about six months.Normally, when things get tough, I can take solace in reading But I surveyed my packing box of favorite books with the apathetic air of someone who stands in front of the open refrigerator for 10 minutes and can t find anything Nothing sounded good So I just sat down and started writing something I would want to read Being a huge fan of vampire movies and TV shows, I wondered, what would be the most humiliating way possible to be turned into a vampire a story that a vampire would be embarrassed to share with their vampire buddies over a nice glass of Type O Well, first, you d have to make the protaganist a bit of an accidental loser She s single, almost 30, and a librarian working in the small Kentucky town where she grew up This triple whammy of worry has made her a permanent fixture on her Mama s prayer list And despite the fact that s pretty good at her job, she just got canned so her boss could replace her with someone who occasionally starts workplace fires She drowns her sorrows at the local faux nostalgia themed sports bar and during the commute home, she s mistaken for a deer and then shot by a drunk hunter And then she wakes up as a vampire.And thus, Jane Jameson and the wacky denizens of Half Moon Hollow were born.It took me almost a year to complete and edit a draft of the book, which I planned as the first in a three book series I spent three months using agentquery to ruthlessly stalk potential literary agents There were a lot of lists involved, I don t want to re live it I was gently rejected by at least half of them I corresponded with some very nice, very patient people, but ultimately signed with the fabulous Stephany Evans of Fine Print Literary Management Stephany was willing to take to the time to give me advice on how to imp


    Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs Comment

    1. Sometimes I think there is a checklist being passed around among writers of vampiric fiction, a kind of The Complete Idiot s Guide to Writing Vampire Fiction, if you will If so, this novel ticks off the following standard hallmarks two possible love interests one noble and one a scrappy rogue for our female vampire creation of a synthetic blood substitute so vampires don t have to kill to get sustenance the vampire community coming out while other supernatural creatures werewolves, witches, etc [...]

    2. You all know that I m a funny whore Not a whore that is funny I m too old to whore nobody wants to buy what I d be selling It s the equivalent of buying a really really old used car And not one of those classic cool older cars More like one that was previously owned by a large family whose kids had incontinence problems, then a chain smoking stunt man with incontinence problems, and then a gang who used it to do drive bys while having incontinence problems So, when I say I m a funny whore, I mea [...]

    3. Audio Book ReviewRegarding the Story Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs is the first book in Molly Harper s Jane Jameson series, a cross between Contemporary and Paranormal Romance, with just a tiny hint of Chick Lit Jane Jameson is an unemployed librarian and newly turned vampire, living in the quirky small town of Half Moon Hollow Vampires have been out of the closet for a while now, and in this first book of the series, we follow Jane as she acclimates to her life as an undead There are plenty of gr [...]

    4. The little dot that sits on top of the i is called a tittle I don t know how I went through my entire life without this piece of information but I m now planning to slip it into conversation somewhere.Like this book could have been great but it s like the author wrote a perfect sentence and left out her tittles.It s not that I actually had any expectations for this book The title is Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs and it has a kind of trashy cover I was really just impressed that it didn t stumble i [...]

    5. Molly Harper straddled the borders of plagiarism to the point of embarrassment Each page you opened has a pop culture reference that I was ashamed to actually know but each time she dropped a name of a book, movie or person Dick Cheney Lindsey Lohan it made me want to throw the book across the room That is not the plagiarism part.Sookie Stackhouse Similarities Stackhouse books are not something you should be proud to steal from Fake bottled blood you have to microwavewalmart referencesvamps comi [...]

    6. This is quirky and adorable Librarian Jane was minding her own business when an accident left her dying and an altruistic vampire bit her and changed her into one of the undead rather than allow her to perish Molly Harper s voice is hilarious, as is this cast of characters, from Jane s kindergarten teacher friend Zev, to her ghost of a great aunt, to Gabriel, the vampire sire who has the hots for her and shows up at just the right times I loved Jane s missteps as she struggles to navigate vampir [...]

    7. 4 Stars Molly Harper writes the kind of humor I love and Amanda Ronconi s narration makes it even funnier Set in Half Moon Hollow, Kentucky, this quirky town breeds some of the most amusing characters In Molly Harper s paranormal world, mankind is aware that vampires exist, and for the most part they are accepting, but not everyone Jane Jameson isn t having a good day, she just lost her job, and after being shot on her way home, she wakes to find out she is now one of the undead Life just got a [...]

    8. Reread February 2017All in the space of one day Jane Jameson is fired from her job as a librarian receiving a 25 voucher to be used at Shenanigans as her severance , is shot by a drunk hunter who mistakes her for an eight pointer buck, and becomes a vampire.She wakes up three days later, with a thirst for blood, a bunch of super powers and some seriously zany characters both helping and hindering her in her first halting steps as a night dweller.This is the second Molly Harper book I have read a [...]

    9. Many of you who read my reviews regularly know that I am a devotee of urban fantasy and that I work in a library The result of these two facts When I read that there was an urban fantasy series that featured an unemployed children s librarian who becomes a vampire, I absolutely had to give it a try And I found it quite entertaining, too.Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs owes quite a debt to the Sookie Stackhouse series, I think Like Harris series, this one is set in a small town in the Southern States [...]

    10. If you prefer your vampires with loads of humor and chicklit style, then Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs by Molly Harper should be right up your alley The author is a former humor columnist and is shows in the snark and hilarity that s part and parcel of this book.Jane Jameson is almost as dull as her name She s a book loving librarian who lives just a few miles from her parents and whose dating life could be its own humor series But nothing can compare to being fired, getting drunk, shot to death b [...]

    11. I m sorry I just couldn t do it Finish it, that is The book just wasn t for me Sucks, really, considering it had things that I normally like sarcasm, sass, funny However, I just couldn t take things serious Or I couldn t take Jane serious Also, I have a feeling that this type of humor just didn t work for me At least not this time I just didn t find it all that funny, and ended up skimming AND there was way too much information Way too much It became quick boring Plus, the male character, Gabrie [...]

    12. Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs is not lesfic it s a hilarious book about coming to terms with being a vampire in a world where vampires are known to exist, but are viewed with suspicion.Jane Jameson, a twenty something librarian, is shot and killed by a drunk who mistakes her for a deer Rather than allowing her to die permanently in such an embarrassing manner, Gabriel turns her into a vampire one of the undead not truly dead As Jane tries to adjust to her new life , someone seems determined to mak [...]

    13. This was a snarky, light hearted paranormal book I enjoyed the author s style and will be continuing the series I liked how the author included snippets from the GUIDE FOR THE NEWLY UNDEAD book at the beginning of each chapter.One of my favorite bits in this book takes place in Chapter 5 Jane, a brand new vampire, goes to visit her best friend to tell him what she has become She is greeted with him repeatedly saying things like The power of Christ compels you and violence They take it upon thems [...]

    14. Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs Jane Jameson 1 by Molly Harper Author Molly HarperTitle Nice Girls Don t Have FangsSeries Jane JamesonCover Rating Book Rating Buy This Book Maybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge When children s librarian and self professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed twenty five dollars in potato skins instead of a severance check, she goes on a bender that s sure to become Half Moon Hollow legend On her way home, [...]

    15. Jane s Secret Unicorn Collection This is a review of the audiobook The first in the Jane Jameson series is wonderfully narrated by Amanda Ronconi she does the snarky inflection of Jane s first person POV just right I think the biggest problem I had with this book was I wasn t in the mood for snarky I know, I know But, it was on my iPod Touch and I couldn t get to what I wanted Too bad Maybe at another time Ditto with continuing the series maybe later I know I like this author however, as Carolyn [...]

    16. 5 Stars I cannot remember laughing aloud as I did with Nice Girls Don t Have Fangs sense Dakota Cassidy Molly Harper is hysterically funny with one of the best comic heroes I have met in a long time I love MH s writing it is quick and witty, and the humor never seems forced The secondary characters are engaging and funny, and the Southern culture and stereotypes add color to the book.My absolute favorite and will read again and again I strongly recommend It has outstanding qualities The characte [...]

    17. Jane Jameson gets mistaken for a deer by a drunk guy and ends up a vampire not quite the way she pictured her life to turn out Jane lives in a small town and for the most part lives a small life She loves working in the library, loves her old house that her aunt Jettie bequeathed to her in her will She hasn t had much of a love life, but her best friend Zeb keeps her company and her dog Fitz named after Darcy Fitzwilliam I heart her already is the joy in her life.So after being fired from her li [...]

    18. This book is kind of hard to rate I enjoyed it and read it quickly, but I felt kind of let down when I finished it.Jane Jameson is fired from her job as a librarian After going out and getting drunk she wakes up to find that she s a vampire The circumstances that lead to her being turned are like none I ve ever read I thought it was hilarious After she wakes up Jane has to learn how to deal with her new life There s a lot of funny supporting characters throughout the book I particularly like her [...]

    19. Oh my god I think I oughta rate this book, in how many times I have fallen out of my chair thus far So far 2 times 1 the movie Her life flashing before her eyes 2 the keys was me 3 the black widow.4 the only reason bob wants to marry grandmother is he realizes its a form of legal assisted suicide 5 have you tried not being a vampire 6 oh yeah Dick CheneyAfter i layed down last night and truly got reading I died laughing from a ton of things Just most were at the first half of the book, dont get [...]

    20. Review posted Happily Ever After ReadsBlog rating 4.5 starsSo much fun that s what I kept thinking reading this first book in the Jane Jameson series by Molly Harper Jane is a typical single female, but her worst day ever starts out the story She s let go from her job as a librarian, she gets drunk later that night at bar On her way home, her car breaks down, she gets out to walk only to trip and fall into ditch, only to then be shot by a drunk who mistook her for a deer A man she met earlier at [...]

    21. Main characters Jane Jameson Gabriel, Jane s sireZeb, her friendRichard Dick CheneyWhat I Liked This is a comedy and, in a way, also a parody of all the vampire books out there Jane, as you saw in the blurb is an honest to God librarian She suffers an untimely accident and to keep her from dying Gabriel changes her into a vampire After this she tries to adapt to the life, and for us, the readers, is hilarious The writer has a tongue in cheek style that is very attractive I loved The Guide for th [...]

    22. The very top of the first page of the first chapter I found a quote I wanted to use I figured Haven t done it before, but hell why not This deserves it and marked with a post it tab it and moved on to read Within ten pages I found another two quotes Before I hit chapter 5 I had neon post it tabs sticking out of my book then a Las Vegas casino sign has lights That s when I gave up keeping track and just kept reading Jane is hilarious I know she comments that she wasn t so special in her B.D bef [...]

    23. Vampirler insanlar taraf ndan biliyor Walmart ta onlar n ihtiya lar na hizmet eden zel b l mler bile var Ger ekten ilgin Jane k t phaneci oldu u i inden kovuldu u g n bir geyik ile kar t r l p vuruluyor lmek zereyken seksi bir vampir olan Gabriel geliyor ve ona hayat n de i tirecek bir se enek sunuyor.3 g n sonra Jane bir vampir olarak uyan yor ve yeni hayat na al maya al rken tavana t rnaklar ile tutunuyoyor, en iyi arkada n s rmaktan son anda geri d n yor st ne stl k bir de zerine cinayet kal [...]

    24. I have heard lovely things about this book and I started it with Great ExpectationsThen I had a strange reading experience.What I liked JaneJane was a librarian who got turned in a very embarassing manner She loved, books, trivia, pizza and her dog Fitz.Her family was eccentric and interesting, her dad was a supportive professor, her mother was a Savant at being passive aggressive, she had the sister from hell and she was closest to her Aunt Jettie.GabrielHe was Jane s sire, patient, proper and [...]

    25. Not bad Pretty funny in parts and overall it was pretty enjoyable I liked the characters even if the plot was lacking a little bit Jane was turned into a vampire after gettign shot by a drunk hunter Right after that I knew I was going to love her She was a hoot most of the time Watching her deal with her vampirism and come to terms with it was somewhat inspiring Gabriel our hero was a little over protective of his child being Jane and it was kind of cute Although we got to see another side of hi [...]

    26. I was worried, like many others, that this would be a blatant Sookie Stackhouse rip off I m sure the author gets that a lot, and frankly, it s undeserved This book I listened in audio form is filled with wry humor and a fun new take on the vampire coming of age story Jane Jameson is a likable and relatable heroine, in many ways reacting far convincingly to vampires in her world than the Bellas and Sookies As far as fun Summer reading goes, this series is off to a good start for me

    27. JANE IS PURE AWESOME Meet Jane Jameson, librarian extraordinaire, an avid collector of unicorn figurines and some serious quotes in referral to Jane Austen and I did I mention she is a newly turned vampire The night life just got interesting with this firecracker What a good time.Jane Jameson is having a very bad day she just got fired from her job as being a librarian, a job that she loves because books are her everything She deals with the sadness by getting drunk and hashing out her problems [...]

    28. OOOOEEEEYYYYAAAWWWW Excited scream, screech or yell I ll leave that up to you This book was so much fun Perhaps a weird thing to say about a book, but it perfectly describes this story Jane hilarious When I was studying for the GRE my favourite vocabulary word was caustic Jane is caustic, and so hilariously inappropriate.The book reminded me of Harris Sookie series because it is based in a society where Vamps are out, so I think there could be some criticisms based on that But really the charact [...]

    29. Officially, I m giving this only a 3 rating, but for the purpose of GR and the fact that I chuckled than once, I am rounding up.Cute, fluffy paranormal vampire read like a beach book Fun, flirty, and distinctive Southern flair But on the bad side of the coin, cliche , cloying, and repetitive.Haven t decided if I ll continue or not Probably will, but only by getting later books in the series via library rather than investing anything into owning them.

    30. Review Courtesy of Dark Faerie TalesQuick Dirty Quirky, sarcastic, almost normal the vampire next door.Opening Sentence I ve always been a glass half full kind of girl.The Review Meet Jane Jameson, normal everyday small town girl Jane is a children s librarian in the public library in the town of Half Moon Hollow, Kentucky where she was born and raised Jane is super smart and quirky, but sarcasm and useless trivia are her strongest points Jane is so universal she fits right in, like she could ju [...]

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